Day 7: Sabbatical Completed; Freed by Truth

I am proud of myself for staying committed throughout this sabbatical.

I attended church today; and, I must say that my soul was more than filled. The message came from Romans 5: 1-12; the sermon, “He looked beyond my faults.” Normally, when going to church, I take notes and record the sermon.

There were a few points that made me think:

  1. Trials teach you patience – patience acquires experience – experience gains hope. These steps are sequential; you can’t skip. Hope is highly positive expectations. God is not negative!
  2. Before and during your trials, learn to praise God. You can’t be a witness if you haven’t truly learned who God is in the storm.
  3. Good things take time. While in your process, let God marinate your situations. Don’t rush them! You won’t receive what God has in store for you. Impatience cause you to just take whatever is convenient.
  4. Learn the difference between concerning and worrying. It’s ok to be concerned. But when your concern becomes worrying, you need to place it in God’s hands.
  5. If you have to ask “why,” then you don’t have faith in God. If you don’t have faith, then you don’t trust him. If you don’t trust him, you don’t believe in him. If you don’t believe in him, it causes you to doubt him.

Well, let’s recap.

Day 1 was basically testing the waters. It did feel good to visit my “academic” mother. She believes in me which causes her to push me to my greater.

Day 2 was heavy hitter #1; I’m learning how to commit and work on me. I’ve always tried to prove myself to others by subjecting myself to be whatever people wanted. I’m learning that self-sacrifice doesn’t help anyone especially me.

Day 3 helped me reconnect to the flow of creativity again. Also, water was a healing element that proved to be more meaningful than I ever realized.

Day 4 was heavy hitter #2; I had to really dig within myself, scratch beneath the surface. I had to unearth the two main traumas that took root. I had to stop doing guesswork and actually acknowledge what I have been truly running from for years.

Day 5 – Bonding is a beautiful form of commitment and trust. Though I bonded with my sister, with anyone else, I know it is a matter of time.

Day 6 reminded me of God’s promise and how I just have to keep trusting in him while still working on me.

Day 7; the day of completion. Everything has come to fruition and seeds have been planted. I’ve seen the truth – I have been set freed.

I love how everything that has been revealed by the good Lord seems to tie in together.

The sabbatical maybe over, but I still have to continue to initiate and commit to changing myself daily.

I’m going to get to the next stage.

Moving forward and up…all the way.

Thank you, Lord for enlightening me!

Day 6: Nature’s Child, Kidnapped, and Coming Full Circle

With the sabbatical coming full circle, today was more revealing and unveiling than any other day.

Earlier, I had decided that I wanted to go swimming in the Reservoir and do a little writing. Due to a major event taking place at the Reservoir, I was not able to swim. So, I took advantage of being in my element, nature. While there, I placed my feet in the water and was able to connect to the flow and write. After I finished the poetic piece, I packed up my things and left.

A friend of mine, whose name is also Jasmine, wanted me to come and visit her. Once I arrived, she wanted to ride with her to the pet store to buy her dog, Massiah’s medicine; but, the pharmacy was closed. We left the store and got back in the car. We sat in the car and Jazmine shared her testimony and backstory with me. I was shocked; I didn’t understand why she felt so comfortable telling me her story to me. But, she was encouraging me to just get closer to God, grow stronger in my faith with him. Also, she decided to invest in my growth by helping me, concerning Emerson. She’s getting married in July on the 28th. She’s invited me to attend her wedding; I promised her I would come. The events included snowballs, helping her chose an outfit, eating, talking, etc. I really had fun. She kept saying, ” I had to kidnap you to finally get you to hang to with me.”

Tomorrow is the last day of my sabbatical. I just thank God for the revealing and unveiling of truth because I have truly been set free.

I will be sharing or doing a summary of all the truths I have learned.

Day 3: Creative, Aquatic Remedy

Today was quite an adventure! For the first time since Elementary, I attended my first art class. Artist’s tools on the menu were paintbrushes and acrylic paint. I panicked a little bit; I was so nervous. But, Ms. Melodie reassured me that everything was going to be okay.

I had talked to Ms. Melodie prior to our art session; I conveyed to her what I wanted to paint. So, she simply drew it and told me I could just paint it.  I sat down at the desk she prepared for me. But, as I looked at the canvas, I had no idea where to start. Ms. Melodie suggested I paint the background first. As we were both working on our projects, she played music from the 90s and now! I’m thinking, “Man, yes! Okay, Ms. Melodie! We have the same taste in music.” Shortly, she received a call from her boss, asking her to meet him. She asked me to ride with her; we headed towards to the location of the community pool. Personally, I’ve never been around a community pool before. Initially, I thought it was cool.

The next minute, I see Ms. Melodie and her co-worker jumping into the pool. I’m looking like, “Why would she jump in the pool with no changing clothes?” I look beside me and her clothes were neatly folded in a chair. Suddenly, I get this itch to get in the water myself. The heat index was unbearable. I found myself staring in a trance at the water. I’m like a fish out of water when it comes to swimming. I just have to get in the water; I can’t resist the subtle call either. I believe Ms. Melodie knew this and began to coerce me.

First, she told me I could just stick my feet in the water. With me, there is no just “sticking my feet in the water.” I HAVE TO GET IN IT! Trying to fool myself, I decided to just “stick my feet” in the water. I sat by the ladder and placed my feet in the water. It felt so good. Then, I quickly inched further in where the water was up to my knees. And then, the water was up to my thighs. I cupped some water in my hands and rubbed it on my face and arms. You can only guess what happened next. I couldn’t fight it anymore. I immersed my entire body in the pool. Forgetting, I didn’t have a change of clothes.

Ms. Melodie laughed and cheered as she figured I would not be able to resist too much longer. While in the water, she provided lessons on how to swim. But, the funniest moment was when she was trying to get me to sink to the bottom of the pool to practice holding on my breath. LOL. However, I tried, and my body would not sink. It wanted to float. I tried to do it once more. This time my body turned a full circle underwater and floated instead. It just refused to sink to the bottom. Me and Ms. Melodie couldn’t do anything but laugh. We left the pool and returned to her house to finish our projects after we changed out of our wet clothes. We both soon learned that our time in the water cut into our painting time. She had another engagement with her sister – movie night.

I finished what I could and told her I would just leave it there until next time. She was okay with it. We agreed to continue our art session next week. I thanked her for the creative, aquatic remedy and how much I enjoyed it.

Once I returned home, I just sat in the bed. I felt so relaxed and calm. I was already aware that water is a healing, cleansing, and purging agent. I didn’t realize it at the time – submerging my body in the pool just sort of “baptized” me. I went in and came out a new person. All the things I was worried about or hanging onto was purged. Also, the art session allowed me to connect back to the flow of creativity I thought I had lost.

This day held more meaning than what I previously thought. I just thought I was going to paint and that’s it. But I discovered a creative, aquatic remedy through Ms. Melody. And my soul is truly at peace.

Thanks, Ms. Melodie! It was much needed.